The New York Times this morning can't seem to get it up to report the news on the front page (don't even get us started on the laughable front page -- front page! -- story on Judith Regan). Even Steven R. Weisman's "Nominee to U.N. Defends Record at Senate Panel" reads more like a montage of recent films than a report of what went down in the Senate yesterday.
Granted, the report's not helped by what appears to be Lincoln Chafee fancying himself as Kevin Costner in Tin Cup. ("Play it as it lays.") And Bolton appears to have thought of another nineties film, What's Love Got To Do With It?, and cast himself as Ike Turner.
From the article:
Mr. Bolton sought to turn his criticism of the United Nations to his advantage, saying his views made him the right person to help restore credibility to the organization and make it more effective.
"If confirmed, I look forward to working closely with this committee to forge a stronger relationship between the United States and the United Nations, which depends critically on American leadership," Mr. Bolton said. "Such leadership, in turn, must rest on broad, bipartisan support in Congress. It must be earned by putting to rest skepticism that so many feel about the U.N. system."
Which can be boiled down as "Sure I smacked Tina around and disrespected her. You could even call it battery or abuse. But put me in the room with her now and if I can turn out a record, the whole world will see that music reigns supereme."
Or they might see Tina Turner beat the s**t out of Ike. (Though I'd never want to see such a rematch take place, if it did, I'd root for Tina.) On the subject of Christian Westermann, Bolton comes off like Ike trying to justify fining the Ikettes for a stray spangle on their stage
costumes: The problem wasn't that we disagreed, it was that he sought clearence for alternative wording.
We'll sum up that response by noting Tina Turner's "Nutbush City Limits*:"
A one-horse town
You have to watch what you’re putting down
But the Times has to take responsibility for skirting the issue of the following statement (which is alluded to but does not appear in this morning's paper):
JOHN BOLTON: If you think that there is any possibility in this country that a 51,000 person bureaucracy is going to be supported by most Americans, you better think again. The Secretariat Building in New York has 38 stories. If you lost 10 stories today it wouldn't make a bit of difference.
You can hear that and more at Democracy Now!'s "John Bolton In His Own Words: Bush's UN Ambassador Nominee Condemns United Nations." (You can watch, listen or read the story.)
You could lose ten stories? Hmm.
You'll learn from the story that some are pinning their hopes on Carter Ford. Let's hope they're right and Ford's able to torpedo the nomination. We'll probably address this later today. But why is waiting for Carter feeling like Waiting for Guffman?
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Note: Tina Turner wrote "Nutbush City Limits." You can find a version of it on her album Simply the Best.
Note: This post corrected to change "spray" to the intended "stray."